vier wochen ohne jbob. und zweie ohne jpat. fühlt sich immer noch nicht gut und nicht okay an. aber der schmerz ist etwas leichter auszuhalten.
bei der besten freundin steht ebenfalls eine trennung von bett & tisch an ... abzusehen zwar, aber trotzdem schade ...
jbob hab ich letzte woche das erste mal seit der trennung gesehen. in einer kneipe, wo wir inmitten des trubels hauptsächlich banalitäten absonderten und das eigentlich wichtige das war, was in den langen gesprächspausen nicht gesagt oder gefragt wurde. das längere conversation in the car in front of his door was deeper - but too much was deep and I did not want to allow. hey, how much depth is expected to midnight, tired and knowing that he again disappears into his Cabinet? and what would I have to also say ... make sure everything is undone, I miss you so, I want to lose you, pattati, pattata? he knows everything.
but now, I've set my level to the draft. and possible has been done. I've tried several times to send him into the desert. So I decide to. and failed repeatedly to it. but I have tried. again and again. just has not only worked.
well, now works anyway do nothing more. from two to zero - in fact I had the possibilities are. (I had not already written the other day - oh, never mind.)
it was bad enough that I then also made the whole cry again. I would like to save me. his hand on my cheek, the delicate touch, comforting, and that was the most beautiful and the most formidable of the evening. and the brief moment where I had his finger in mine. so short. God it hurt! and god, that was nice!
yes, I was very shocked. but I was not torn as bad as I feared it. after all, what. but why, why, why I do not have this dimwitted guy really so? please stop, the last time? damn ...
are professionally there for morning air today I had "my" request for authorization presented to the responsible people of the community - a walk. real. in 15 minutes I was back out there. I have just the thing on Mon Now imagine the technical committee and make another presentation tinker. but this will, which is ...
vehicle was technically today also cause for hope: the lease agreement for four-wheel baby ends in early May, and should I get the financing for the acquisition of the babies, were the conditions when the b-bank absolutely exact, which I so im stillen kämmerlein ausgedacht und gewünscht hab. tja, nun muss das nur noch klappen. ich finde, verdient hätt ich es, dass wenigstens ein was jetzt mal klappt.
bin ich zu anspruchsvoll?
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